That dreaded deployment cycle has started again. I've been sticking my head in the sand about it as much as humanly possible, but suprisingly enough that hasn't slowed it down. Curses! Anywho, I wasn't aware of how, even though I've stuck my head in the sand about it, my emotions were already on the rollercoaster until Grey's Anatomy premiered the other night. Yes, Grey's Anatomy sent me into deployment mode.
For those of you who don't watch Grey's, it was all about saying goodbye to a close friend/co-worker who'd been hit by a bus and the different stages of grief (I thought there were more then just 5, but oh well). So all of my not on a deployment cycle friends said "oh it's awful...i cried and cried through the whole episode". Consequently, I waited to watch episode until Army Guy was at work, Thing 1 was at school and Thing 2 was off and about doing her own thing because I hate being all boo-hooy in front of them. So there I was, curled up in chair, with kleenex, pressing play on DVR, completely prepped for the sobs. 34 minutes into the episode though--no tears. Just anger. Big hairy anger. "What the (insert really ugly word here) are these people so freakin boo-hooey about?!?!?! THEY GET TO SAY GOODBYE!!! THEY GET TO HAVE THEIR LAST WORDS WITH HIM!!!! THEY GET TO HOLD HIS HAND!!!!--if anything bad happens, I won't get that luxury!! They don't know how freakin lucky they are!!!!" It was at this point that I realized I'm in deployment mode, whether I want to be or not. I did eventually sniffle while watching Grey's but it was at the end of the episode when they showed how everyone else was handling their grief stages.
So, I've made my "things to do before he leaves" list. I'm labeling Thing 1's maps, buying Thing 2 her own map, and looking for a Daddy Doll (not the creepy stuffed picture pillow thing tho) for Sam-I-Am. I'm accepting that I'm potentially 6 months out and I'm putting my big girl panties on and dealing with it.
Stupid Grey's Anatomy. :D
1 comment:
I've found that "putting on my big girl panties" and just getting through it is the best way. Some days are really really bad... most days are pretty good. And then one day you realize... "Army guy has been gone a VERY Loooonnnggg time... I know this because ducklings are asking for 'pretty toes' like mommy has." Yep.. it's REALLY time for him to come home now. I figure just about the time boys want pretty toes.. that's been nearly a year!
You'll be fine. Actually, you'll be more than fine. Because you are WOMAN... and a very strong one at that!
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